Wednesday, May 13, 2009

the start and end of something

some days its about going in head first. about waking up with a purpose or because a cat is sitting on your head. about spending time with the people that matter. about preparing to go out in a tornado to deliver flowers and words of love. i can honestly say that i've had an enlightening vacation visiting my old home. the rain is pounding and thunder is sounding and i couldn't think of a better send off really. i have rarely heard thunder since living in sf and i truly appreciate its utter beauty.

i suppose spending time here makes me slightly nostalgic and slightly eggy and slightly sad with chicago. i took the train north and watched the factory buildings and water towers pass before my eyes. on a cloudy fantastic day, i bought enough gum for the rest of my life, ate some bacon, and tromped around in a forest preserve. i thought about the world, about my future, about snow covered landscapes in poland. how i want to be everywhere at every single minute and no where all of the time. everywhere and no where with some classical music and some whiskey.

i suppose one year of graduate school should have me feeling a bit more ready for something, anything, everything. it does and it doesn't. i am excited to start reading about detroit's history and to finally read nietzsche's the birth of tragedy along with a whole bunch of books i have put off until now. i am excited to get back to california with some ideas about a few shows i want to do and actually get down to business. i am excited about life in a way that i have not been for a bit. i just need to renew my passport so impromptu trips anywhere is actually possible. in case anyone wants to take me somewhere i want to be. which is everywhere, all of the time.

picture from here

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